“Ho hum,” mused Lord Snatch, displaying a becoming sang fraud as the tincture of guano and the quick-dry cement gradually seeped into his upper colon, and there began to set, “ho hum,” said he, “where to begin?” —
Lord Snatch
“You might begin by explaining,” said Clismathea, “how you succeeded in gaining admittance to the Farter. Acquitted Ken can be a tad discriminant.” —
Acquitted Ken, The Startling Farter, Clismathea
“Cloak and dagger, what what!” trilled Enematopoeia, “I say, such larks.” —
Enematopoeia
“I surmounted the obstacle which Mr Acquitted’s obduracy presented,” said he, “with the aid of the houyhnhnm pelt in which it pleases me to grace the present company, in company with that most diligent psychopath of my acquaintance Mr Harrison Lupine, I yesterday afternoon liberated from a certain fancy dress emporium adjacent to the fountains by which it has traditionally pleased those excellent fellows, the aficionados of apple-based liqueurs, to disport themselves. —
Houyhnhnm pelt, Houyhnhnm, Mr Harrison Lupine
For their part, the Kurts and Troys were divided among themselves as to the sagacity of Lady Valerie’s intercession; some took us to be an escapee from the hippodrome which is upon the plateau or plain of Marathon at Lansdowne, and offered to procure us hay, urging that we be received into the Farter in order for Acquitted Ken to earn a reward from the charioteers of the hippodrome aforesaid; others evinced the suspicion that we were merely a brace of hipsters masquerading as an houyhnhnm; indeed, one of their number, a hoary old lion of Judah known in those purlieus as Lacon the analist, voiced his fear of geeks borne inside gifthorses. I - if you will exert yourselves to find not too distasteful the mixture of metaphor - bridled at so noisome a calumny against the divine ordination of inherited privilege, and was quite ready to disembarrass myself of my disguise and assume my rightful place before the οἱ πολλοί. However, just as I was on the point of putting off that loathsome hide, I felt in my posterior a sharp sensation. —
Lacon the analist
I also seem to recall hanging about the place like a bad smell the fake psychopath Wanksie. His presence surprised me not in the least, given his notorious veneration of Mr Harrison Lupine, in relation to whom he stands as the shadow to the form. He, clad as ever in the mildewing camouflage of his long-forgotten youth, on creaking joints unbecomingly twerked. The knaves whom with his overfamiliarity he vexed urged him to have congress with his dilapidated truck, but to do so elsewhere, and I found that I shared the inclination to encourage him in his vice. —
Wanksie
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