Bristol

My Lady Kelly must have found greatly to her liking the seething metropolis Bristol, that capital city of all proto-Celtic mystical hippy far-I nonsense, for once arrived she never departed, but rather put down roots albeit of a sickly kind, and became one of the appointed nymphs of that grove, withal there was little that was sacred about it. A significant factor in her tarrying in our city was her…

…Thence, by diverse labyrinthine processes, that autocopraphageous personage made his way to Bristol, where he enrolled as a member at Pex ’n’ Quads, and in a droll moment proclaimed himself number 2 in the League of Spartacists which I had myself set up to defend the interests and eke the sanity and very persons of the members of Pex ’n’ Quads against the insults and injuries with which the management…

…Slovakian au pairs, and at the thugs disporting with their Jezebels, all under the Argos eyes of the Bristol High Presidium, and finds that even his sternly cynical heart is in some measure gladdened. Withal and, I have to concede, wisely, he refrains from divulging the fruits of his introspections to his passengers.

Upon their return to Bristol, Mr and Mrs Helix Folt settled down to conjugal life in an exceedingly spacious and well-appointed penthouse just round the corner from Victoria Square. Whether or not this is sad to relate, their union was not blessed with issue, the explanation for which I rather suspect may relate to Mrs Helix Folt’s having exceeded the age at which issue generally blesses union. Suffice to say…

…To this end, he had one or two years previously obtained a sinecure as the Bristol City Council Poncemaking Director, in which capacity he strove to render Bristol even poncier than Bath, for which travails he was expected to make do with a modest annual pittance, viz. £72,000 plus luncheon vouchers, corporate Chelsea tractor lease, and a pleasingly gamine personal assistant. In marked contrast to Mr Crass Cheseham, who to…

…in Anchor Road - Miss Bianca Columbina after a short but decent interval had followed him back to Bristol, very much under the impression that the connection between them was shortly to be made respectable in the eyes of the world.

As, reflecting on these grave matters, the Mayor of Bristol flapped back across Durdham Downs, his passage was once more observed by the pair of black eyes, which looked up from the entrails of the corpsed vole into which the black beak in front of them had been poking.

…the corroding metals just alluded to; and inasmuch as in late November a cold and greasy precipitation drenched Bristol, and set St Just, that Proudhon of Stokes Croft, a-shiver under the paltry sheets of cardboard which were his only prophylactic against the notorious inclemencies of Our climate; and inasmuch as the aforementioned drums constructed of corroding metals were by this means brought into conjunction with water; marry they corroded, and…