Strapon
Character
Titus’s accountant, professional comforter and reluctant spa acquaintance. He survives the changing-room encounter with less dignity than the jacuzzi, where he later meets his end rather nobly.
Appears in
From the books (4 passages)
- Strapon! You who have been my accountant for these several years! Bodies still ok beneath the patio? Or did the Vat-man sniff them out again?
…spell was finally broken by the second most unlikely individual to assume the mantle of action hero, namely Strapon my accountant. This august personage mounted the steps and floundered headlong into the pool where, grabbing handfuls of that seaweed rug, he endeavoured to raise Ertha’s huge head above the placid surface of the water. But his strength was feeble notwithstanding his bulk, and he and Ertha fell back into the…
…bestowed with the honour in question by virtue of adopting the number 12 in our system. This was Strapon my accountant, as of course I well knew, having myself devised the numbering system and the algorithm for mezzanine/penthouse prize selection, as well as having presided over the original Spartacist choosing of numbers.
To repeat an earlier intimation, I liked and to some extent admired Strapon. Down the years his diligence with off-setting capital gains against losses, and personal allowances, and legitimate off-shore avoidance schemes had kept a great deal of my shit from the taxman’s ravening maw. Moreover, he always leavened his professional courtesies with good cheer, not to say a certain dexterity of wit, which quite belied the dour reputation of…